Here’s a little something for Mother’s Day. This happened in our house this week.
8:27 PM
3 year old to big sister: Hi.
Big sister: You should be in your bed.
3 year old: I not want to be in my bed.
Big sister: Go hug mom.
3 year old: I not want to hug mom. She make me go to my bed.
At least he’s honest, right?
Here’s to all the laughs motherhood brings, and to the dream of undisturbed sleep. Happy Mother’s Day!
I was digging through old unpublished posts, in case there was something I had forgotten to finish up, and found this little jewel from 2018. If I were just disciplined enough to keep track of all the hilarious things my kids say when they’re “playing pretend!” I have no idea what the game was, but it included these quotes:
“Oh, no, I forgot my parents!”
“Wait, you can’t use a carseat for an altar.”
“You just knocked in the back of the church!” (as opposed to the front, apparently)
They almost feel like a writing prompt: write a story including all of these quotes…they were part of a story once, maybe they can be again!
Lucy was going through an old notebook this afternoon, and found a club she and Clare made up for themselves a couple of years ago: the VSDG group.
Which stands for the Vegetarian Spy Detective Girl Scout Group. (They left out the “S” for some reason.)
This is one in a litany of clubs they’ve made up over the years, of course. This one lasted roughly two days.
Clare gave up being a vegetarian when we had hot dogs for dinner. Goodbye VSDG.
The next iteration of the Baker Girls Club is in discussion as we speak. We’ll see if they can outdo their past efforts.
Me: “Clare, what kind of ice cream do you want for your birthday?”
Clare: “Rock ‘n Roll!”
Me: “You mean Rocky Road?”
Clare: “Yes!”
I’m not sure I want to know what goes into “Rock ‘n Roll” ice cream…
Although Google tells me it is both an ice cream shop in Georgia and a vinyl album. Of course.
The Scene:
Isaac is playing with a (purple) bow. Of the bow-and-arrow, not hair decoration, variety. The arrows (mercifully) are missing.
Samantha: “No, Isaac! You can’t shoot people.” Pause. “UNLESS they’re sleep darts. I’m OK with sleep darts.”
Anyone know where I could get some of those?
Me, trying to distract Clare while Sam feeds the cat : So when we have animals, what animal do you want to feed?
Lucy: I want to milk the cat!
Me: Milk the cat!?!
(Raucous laughter)
Regarding a diaperless Clare…
Lucy: “That is a pretty big bottom. I’d like to keep looking at it. ‘Cause it’s pretty big.”
To Clare playing in the living room…
Samantha, in her sweetest cajoling mommy voice: “I appreciate you doing good. Thank you.”
Me: Would you like some broccoli?
Samantha: I don’t like broccoli.
Me: What do you like? Besides cookies and candy.
Samantha: I like ice cream and cake. And icing on cake.
My mom claims she gets it from her, and that she got it from her mother. I think it’s time to start making some “nutritional” cookies. 😉 (= sneaky mommy face)
Lucy has a theory. She thinks that all we need to do to make the world a better place starts with a little Holy Water. You take some of this “magical” stuff in a cup, and go find a bad person. You have two weeks to do this, as she assured us this evening that the water stays good for two weeks. When you find the bad person, you have them drink the Holy Water. Then they won’t want to be bad any more.
I want to live in her world.
That was Samantha’s explanation. Now for the story.
I was next door at Bob and Mary Lou’s house, with Clare. I thought that Ben and Helen (Craig’s parents) were at the store, and Lucy and Samantha were swimming with Uncle Sean. When I came back, I found that Ben and Helen were back and Samantha was in trouble. Apparently after they had finished swimming, she had put on a pair of Nana’s shoes, which meant she was Nana, with all the rights and privileges accompanying that. So she unlocked the back door, went out and got herself a beer out of the mini-fridge by the pool, because, as she said, “I thirsty.”
(Fortunately, she’s not as good at opening cans as she is at unlocking doors.)